Fearless Flipper ... forever ...

Tomorrow afternoon, Flipper and I are heading out into the wilderness to camp for two days, sleeping under the stars, living off the land ... No, not really.

Try driving to the Uwharrie National Forest, sleeping in our huge new tent and eating out of our cooler, not to mention drinking our morning coffee freshly brewed in the bathhouse. That is a free little tip, people. Take your cheap Mr. Coffee (an ironic name if I ever heard one, since I bet that it is mostly sleep-deprived WOMEN that brew about 97 percent of the coffee consumed out of a cup that IS NOT made out of paper) traveling with you, and plug it in for fresh coffee in the morning.

Many years ago, I spent six to seven weeks driving around America one summer in an ancient Volvo station wagon with my equally ancient dog in one of my many attempts to "find myself." This is a trip I recommend HEARTILY to EVERYONE.

And why the Volvo, pray tell? Well, once you fold the back seat up against the front seats, you have a little over SIX FEET of room to stretch out and sleep. If you are 5'6" like me, this is PERFECT.

Anyway, I drove many hours each day, stopped at nice little family campgrounds and KOAs at night, mostly because they were happy to have dogs there. In the morning I would wend my way through the RVs and truck campers to the bathroom, whereupon I would plug in my $14.99 Mr. Coffee and brew a full pot, while the other occupants of the bathroom stared at me. Enviously.I even did this in a few gas station bathrooms as well.

Then I poured it into a carafe, and hit the road. Day after day. I would drive and sing and talk to Martha (the dog) and stop at random sites across America that caught my eye. Believe me, there are MANY.

I often wonder two things: Will Flipper do this one day? Spend many many days, months, years cruising around America, (usually chasing some band), sleeping wherever, having a good time, and a few scary times as well? Will she inherit the wanderlust that my dad, my sister and I all have? Or will she be more of a homebody like my mom and Flipper's dad, enjoying vacations, but not just driving and stopping and driving again?

The second thing I wonder: Will I actually be able to let her head out and not worry? Or, rather, not worry to distraction? How did my parents DO this? Let us, at times together but usually alone, just ... go. Before cell phones, before the Internet. Collect calls from pay phones and very very cheap, cinder block motel rooms. I think they really believed we could take care of ourselves and deal with any problems that arose. They were right.

How did they get this confidence? By providing a fair amount of freedom to us when we were growing up. Walking to school. Exploring the acres and acres of woods near our home, woods that are long gone now, razed to make way for the explosive growth near 54 and 55. Banning weekend visits home while we were in college, aside from official school breaks. (Though, truth to be told, I could not imagine why ANYONE would want to go home after tasting the glorious freedom of college life).

Can I do this with Flipper? Do I even want to? Selfishly, I do not. The worst, most awful part of me totally gets those helicopter parents, the ones that call their kids every ten minutes or so while their kids are in college. I want us to be as close as we are now, just the two of us, living pretty happily together, both physically and emotionally very very close and connected.

But the other part of me, the logic-driven part, wants her to be free, to WANT to travel by herself, to NOT describe her mother (me) as her "best friend" as I would hope her best friend would be a bit closer in age and a little more risk-taking than I am now.

The other part of me knows that I might not want to, but I have to. And, then, hopefully, she'll return. Safe and sound.

So, this weekend, we start. When we (I) first kicked around the idea of camping, she wanted to know if her dad or Grampy would be going with us. I avoided my knee-jerk Ms magazine reaction: WE DON'T NEED SOME GUY TO GO CAMPING WITH US, FLIPPER!! — to actually, thoughtfully, asking her WHY she wanted them to tag along. Answer? She's worried about bears. Where does she GET this stuff??

The irony is that while my dad, the Eagle Scout, could easily create a four-room condo out of a tarp and a roll of twine, Flipper's dad never went camping while he was a kid, and on the last "camping" trip (really an overnight, outdoor party) he threw the tent on the ground and slept on top of it. Why would we bring them? They can outrun us, I tell her. We need someone slower than us to "protect" us from bears!!

P.S. She doesn't get it. Yet. But she will!!

I sense our "adventure" will make for some highly amusing future posts and pictures. That alone makes it worthwhile!! Nevermind the Life Lessons I hope to impart from my lofty perch of wisdom ...

*True story: I have seen some serious wildlife in my many traverses around this great country of ours and, coming unexpectedly close to a bear in Colorado was, by far, the scariest encounter ever. They are not afraid of us. They are indifferent to our presence. And my dog? Just a potential appetizer in the bear's mind.

Leigh appears every Monday on TriangleMom2Mom. To read more about Leigh, go to Flipper and Me.