Five years ago, when I had a newborn in my arms and a nineteen month old at my knee, I read a quote that puzzled me. The gist was that if you wanted to know if time flew, ask a mom who had just dropped her child off at the first day of Kindergarten. At the time, I thought the quote was crazy, insane and just plain ludicrous. Those early days were hard and there were days that I swore that an hour lasted a year, especially days involving rain, snow or a high fever.

Well, last week I was the mom in that quote. I dropped my youngest off at his first day of Kindergarten on Monday. As he walked to class with his brand new backpack which is almost as big as him, I thought about the quote and I couldn’t figure out the answer.

In some ways, it seems like yesterday that my kids were born. They have changed so quickly and the milestones happened too fast. My once tiny infants are now reading, swimming, and riding bikes with just two wheels. Many of the moments that I wanted to remember forever have fade into a big blur. I swore that every precious saying, smile and kiss would stay forever imprinted in my mind. But as it always happens, only a few have stayed vivid in my memory.

But in many ways, it seems like lifetimes ago. It is actually WAS lifetimes ago, because my life is so different. Before I had children, my house had candles and tiny glass vases on the windowsill. We had glass coffee tables and end tables. Oh, and I actually had dining room furniture in my dining room. These days my dining room is a playroom with a large Lightening McQueen tent in the center. My pantry is stocked with gallon sized containers of goldfish and my refrigerator is covered with hand drawn (by my six year daughter) pictures of princesses wearing bikinis. Back then, my friends and I snuck out of work for two hour sushi lunches. Now, we sneak in snippets of conversation while we help our children navigate the monkey bars at the park. My husband and I used to sleep in on the weekends and take leisurely Sunday afternoon naps. This past weekend, I begged my children to let me sleep in till 7 am.

More importantly, I am not the same person. The changes in myself are so dramatic and permanent that it feels like decades since I walked through my front door the first time with my daughter in my arms. I can’t remember what it was like to be myself before children and I know I wouldn’t want to go back (although I really do miss the weekend naps).

 I realized very quickly that it takes a lot of patience to be the type of parent that I want to be. I have grown from a person whose childhood nickname was "Princess Little Patience" to a mom who my friends describe as very patient. I never thought I would develop enough flexibility to realize that the most important memories are the ones made by throwing out plans and schedules to have an picnic in the living room in a blanket fort. Or that spending the afternoon catching butterflies was time well spent. I am positive that everyone who recieved an 8 page schedule of my wedding day ten years ago would also never have thought that I would become flexible. But I have.

I was so excited at all that I could teach my children, but I am positive that I have learned more and changed more than they have.

So, I don't know the answer about time. I just know that I wouldn't trade the past 6 3/4 years for anything. But most importantly, I hope that I can always remember the goodbye kiss my little boy gave me at the front of his school on Monday morning.