Part of being in a family is learning that you don't always get your way. In our house, this lesson repeats itself. Daily. Every time Big Guy and Little Guy are forced to get in the car and head to their sibling’s practice or game.

What surprises me about this process is not Little Guy’s occasional meltdown as he’s forced to drop what he is doing to trudge yet again to a rink. Not Big Guy’s “I’m going to be soooo bored” comment as we make our way to the soccer field. It’s the way that once they get there, all the complaining is forgotten. And all the siblings befriend each other.

It’s amazing to watch children make friends. It’s a genuine, innocent effort. It comes so naturally.

No matter the activity, by virtue of all these siblings being stuck in the same boat, they find each other. Age doesn’t matter. Boys and girls flock together and figure out how to pass the time. Unlike adults, who in similar situation may bury their head in a book, avoid eye contact or just flash a pleasant smile, the kids have no inhibitions and simply say, “Wanna play?”

One early summer morning, I watched a group of kids spin each other around until they fell in the wet grass while their brothers played soccer. One recent evening, I watched a combination of “American Idol” and “So You Think You Can Dance” performed in the hallway of the RecZone. I’m not sure who had more fun. The kids skating or the kids waiting.

Not only do kids make their own fun when left to themselves, they are also pros at rekindling relationships. A three month summer break does nothing to disrupt the rhythm of friendships in elementary school. On the first day of school, my boys saw their buddies and it was as if the summer never happened. It didn’t matter that I forgot to schedule that play date or that the sleepover never panned out. The kids pick right back up.

A mother of one of Big Guy’s friends summed up their easy going, easy play relationship perfectly. “With boys, friendship is like a pile of clothes lying on the floor. They put on whatever’s there. And it works.”

Up to this point, truer words have not been spoken. Which makes me wonder. Is this easygoing way of friendship a boy thing? If so, will it always be this way?

I sure hope so. I like the “wanna play” phase. It’s so uncomplicated. I lived through high school. I know what could be coming. Whether you’re a boy or a girl, at some point, it can be hard to fit in. And occasionally, even as adults, the drama we thought we’d left so far behind, so long ago, back in high school, seems to sneak into our lives.

My boys have seen enough made-for-TV Disney movies to get that friendship can be more complicated as you get a bit older. They believe the nice, happy messages about the importance of being yourself. How true friendship always prevails.

But they also see that the road can be bumpy. They’ve now heard of this thing called “popular." The phrase “trying to be cool”. They’ve learned a bit about both unconscious and conscious labeling. And how friends can be rotated like outfits.

Right now, these concepts have little meaning. And fortunately, little applicability. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that it stays that way. It could happen. I’ve been told I have the gender thing working in my favor.

But if and when the time comes, my boys will have to figure out what kind of people they want to be. If they choose wisely - by choosing to just be themselves - perhaps they’ll rise above any situation thrown their way.

Hopefully, they’ll just want to play.

Illyse appears Thursdays on TriangleMom2Mom.