I’m mostly a stay at home mom. So most of my work is done in the home, for the benefit of the people that live in it. I do freelance work, but that too, is done from my home. In a chair, seated in front of my handy old computer.  And when I need to venture out, I turn to my rolling home on wheels

I’ve been content with my home-based life. I haven’t felt as though I was missing out on the outside-the-home scene.

That is, until the day I got to go to the City Council committee meeting.  

You see, over the summer, I had a little issue in my backyard. I spent most of the summer working with one of the city’s departments to reach a compromise.  Unfortunately, by early fall, I’d hit a dead end.  

Not ready to let it go, I went looking for help.  And the help came in the form of a councilman.  Councilman Rodger Koopman.  With his help, my dead end turned into an open road.  A road that led to a City Council committee meeting a few Thursdays ago.

For many an average person, this may not have been a big deal.  But for this average person, it was. I got to dress up, make my hair pretty, put on a little makeup, prepare my presentation and practice what I would say.

I had to navigate downtown and park in the deck. (Where, to the dismay of the parking deck attendant, I drove right past the ticket dispenser.)   Take the elevators. (Which, to my dismay, I missed on its first arrival. I was too busy reading the list of departments located in the building.)  

I had to walk into a large, official looking room, stand behind a podium, present my situation, use a microphone, talk slowly, have a discussion, calm my nerves. And be composed.  

Everything about that 9 a.m. meeting dug out little pieces of the old me. From the preparation to the presentation.   It was getting a taste of the working-outside-the-home world.  

Granted, it was a very small taste.   A real, outside-the-home job – for an actual employer, working an actual full day - would be far more demanding and far more challenging than I could imagine. Yet the experience took me back to a world I used to know well.  For a few brief hours, I was a transformed woman.  A woman that didn’t have the mom uniform. Or the mom ponytail.

Later that night, I realized I’d learned an important lesson about myself.  Which in and of itself is odd. So many days are spent going through the motions.  Running to get to the next destination.  It’s easy to miss a message.

If there is ever a doubt that we, as stay at home mothers, can do more than just be in this stay at home role, it’s time to let it go.  I have listened to friends say that they could not go back into the world of the working, even if they wanted to.  They question what skills they could possibly bring to the table. Where they’d fit or how they’d get started. They can’t even remember how they did their pre-baby jobs. At times, I’ve felt the same way.

I’ve learned that although I’m out of practice, I could do it. I could like doing it. It’s reminded me that although I am completely content being a mother, it’s just one part of me.  Sure, it’s one of the larger parts. One of the most important.  But it doesn’t have to define me.  

And that can be hard to remember.  For although we as women play many different roles, the role of mother tends to overshadow all others. It’s full time whether we work or not.  It’s the one role that is never forgotten, that we never get a break from.  And while some of us have continued to do it all, there are those of us who put some of those parts that we’ve played – the parts from our past - on the back burner.

For those of us who have done that, we have to remember that it is just the back burner.  We can pull it to the front whenever we want.

Illyse appears Thursdays on TriangleMom2Mom.