I’m in that awkward stage of pregnancy when I dread going to the closet each morning.  My waistline has expanded to the point that any pants or shorts with a button no longer fit, elastic waists make me feel sort of dumpy, and most of the maternity bottoms are still a bit loose.  Shirts are no better.  My protruding tummy seems so noticeable under regular shirts and makes me feel self-conscious.  But it’s buried under maternity tops and I look rather silly wearing them with my as yet fairly small bump.  (There’s also that whole bra issue that I won’t go into.)  

Whatever I do decide to wear, I feel like everyone’s looking at me when I go out and thinking, “Is she pregnant or just a little fat?”  I know very few people actually notice, and maybe not any.  I also know I shouldn’t care if anyone does think that.  It’s possible that the other symptoms of early pregnancy are just making me cranky and overly sensitive.  But part of me wants to put a “baby on board” sign on my tummy and get it over with.  Not that I would ever do that.  During my last pregnancy, my mom bought me a pink top with a picture of a stork on the front and even that was too much for me.  I only wore it a few times when I expected my sisters to be the only ones to see it.  They laughed of course, but they were laughing at mom, not me… I think.

 I guess I should be happy I have anything to wear.  I remember near the end of my last two pregnancies when even a few of the maternity items got a bit snug.  This time I’m expecting twins so it may be even harder to keep that tummy covered at the end.  But worrying about how much worse it could get doesn’t make any of the current options more appealing.  This might be the only time in a woman’s life when she stands in the closet and honestly believes that being bigger would be just as good as being smaller.