Wow. I am sorry she has such anxiety being away from you. My daughter has separation anxiety and becomes very frightened when I am away from her. She is always latched to mom, but I admit that I am very fond of her too. She is much better with it now at the age of 2 1/2. I started out small doing things like telling her when I was leaving, staying with her in the Sunday room until she was comfortable with the people and the environment, etc.

I know that you have been seeing this guy for 10 weeks, but I would say to not rush giving him the "daddy duties," especially if your daughter is not comfortable. Kids know things and can sense things... not to say he is a bad guy and not to say that you and him don't have a good relationship. I don't know him, I don't know you, I am just an outsider commenting on what you have written.

If she is uncomfortable with him taking her away from you and being in a room alone with him, don't allow that to happen anymore. If she is uncomfortable with him putting her to bed, don't let him do it. If he is up in the morning and she is screaming and freaking out, get up and be with her until she creates that bond that you desire for her to have with your boyfriend.

In the meantime, trying to build you and his relationship without building the "family relationship" may be a much wiser move for you and your daughter. It will be you and her and her comfort, happiness, and safety comes first.

Trust me, I speak from experience.... take your time and build a relationship with this guy and slow down... your daughter will deal with her anxiety in due time.

Best of luck,

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I agree with the writer above after only 10 weeks of dating you are still getting to know this guy and I think you may be pushing the relationship with him and your daughter. I dated my now husband for almost 6 months before he was allowed to really start bonding with my son I had to make sure that he was someone that I trusted and somone that would stick around before I allowed him to create a mark on my childs life.

My advice is to get to know this guy a little more before you allow your daughter to build a relationship with him. It sounds like you have a good guy who is willing to accept you and your child so take your time. Let him get to know you first =) and once your daughter see's the bond between the two of you she''ll warm up to him. I wish you all the best.

You better hope that he is not a pervert. If yiu dont know this man why the hell would you leave him alone woth your baby. do you watch the news? there are alot if sick people out here and maybe those screams are her wanting to get away from a sick man that you dont know that well. Please dont let him hurt your daughter because you are desperate for a man right now. i have heard this type of stuff so many times. BE CAREEFUL.

As a single mom who has dated, I definitely agree with the replies already posted.  Your daughter is expressing a real unmet need, and apparently it's one that only YOU can fill. (and definitely not by forcing her in the direction of her fears) This behavior will pass, but if and when this guy "passes" too, you will be left with the torment of parenting an even more insecure daughter.  The best thing you can do now is to dedicate time each day to spend with her, doing the things she likes.  Don't include new beau in this Mommy-Daughter time, or anyone else, for that matter.

During these few first precious years, give her a solid foundation for life where you demonstrate to her that she is the most important person in your life.

The "pull" you are feeling is an influx of dopamine and hormones that can easily blind us to problematic flaws in a new romantic "prospect."  It would be advisable for you to investigate this man's past.  

You alone,represent the source of her safety and well being.  This is the job that automatically comes with being a parent.  The selfless measures you take now will one day pay off more than you can imagine.  Know this:  Your daughter is not acting out to spite you or anyone.  She is fearful and needs you to protect her.

In the first six months of a dating relationship, you are  the recipient of the best of that person.  If this man is not virtuous, you will regret allowing him to force his way into your daughter's life.  I would think if he cared about her, he would not want to continue doing things with her that only make her cry.

You will survive without others taking your daughter so that you can sleep/rest, and you will even survive without a mate. I assure you, having no partner is far better than destroying the parent-child bond with a bad one.

If this guy turns out to have done anything inappropriate, you will have to answer to more than your own heart.  Social Services receives many anononymous tips upon which they investigate immediately.  And, as a result, many moms in search of romantic love have lost their children and their beaus as well.

I know you don't want to hear all of this, but you can't help your daughter to be OK with one or both of your eyes tightly shut.And I promise that you will not be OK if your daughter isn't.

And, please, please, I urge you to not allow a pregnancy to crop up out of this new fling.  You will be the one who is stuck with the outcome of your parenting choices, good or bad. And often, parents don't recognize their mistakes until the opportunity to correct is no longer available.

I believe there is still opportunity to comfort your daughter, who will be with you after all the guys are gone.  One day you may desperately need her comfort.  She will not be able to give what she has not been given. 

Our young children are blank slates, upon which we inscribe the perspective from which they will discover their destinies.