As anyone who knows me or who has read my blog postings here knows, I am a huge fan of Ellyn Satter and her "division of responsibility" when it comes to feeding toddlers and older children. Put simply: It is a parent's responsibility to decide the what, when, and where children are served food, while it is a child's responsibility to decide whether and how much food to eat.

But what about Halloween candy? Surely, you can’t let the kids decide how much candy to eat. Can you?

Well, actually you can … if you do it within the structure of meals and scheduled snacks.

Here’s the advice Ellyn gives on the "sticky topic of Halloween candy":

When he comes home from trick or treating, let him lay out his booty, gloat over it, sort it and eat as much of it as he wants. Let him do the same the next day. Then have him put it away and relegate it to meal - and snack-time: a couple of small pieces at meals for dessert and as much as he wants for snack time .… Offer milk with the candy, and you have a chance at good nutrition. [Copyright © 2008 by Ellyn Satter. Published at www.EllynSatter.com]

This is is what we have been doing at our house, and it has been working really well. Here we are only a few days past Halloween and our kids' stash of candy is nearly gone. I guess it’s not surprising given how much candy they’ve been eating with their afternoon snack. But it hasn’t really affected their mealtime eating, plus they still get a nutritious morning snack.

Best of all, we don’t have arguments over how much candy they can have at the various "seatings." Sure, they ask for more than the 1 or 2 we let them have with lunch and dinner, but it’s easy to tell them "No, you get/got to have all the candy you want at afternoon snack."

And although it might seem inconceivable to adults, the kids really do stop eating when they’re full during that ~3:30 p.m. sit-down "candy binge." I guess when they’re not worried about whether it will be taken from them, the become less gluttonous about it.

And maybe even less greedy. Today I watched my 6-year-old daughter give away some of her candy to her little brother. I don’t think he even asked her for it! And this despite my constant reassurances to Gemma during the past few days that, no, she doesn’t have to share her candy with Jake if his is gone before hers is.

I don’t know what prompted her to share her candy with him. Sure, it was mostly the pieces that she didn’t like very much… but not always. Could it be she felt some satisfaction in the communal eating? That it was more pleasurable to her to share with him rather than watch him go without? Could Halloween candy really be that… redemptive?!

I guess I’ll have to ask her.

Nancy writes monthly for TriangleMom2Mom about food.