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Surprise, Surprise, They Do Listen
Do kids ever listen? I ask them to pick up their toys. Nothing. I ask them to brush their teeth. Zip. I ask them to eat their broccoli. Zilch.
The truth is kids listen all the time. They may not obey, but the definitely listen. In fact, they listen to it all – the good, the bad and the ugly.
How do I know this? I know this, because my girls give me subtle proof every day.
I knew it when Sarah dropped the s-word in front of my mother-in-law. She didn’t pick that up from Noggin. She heard it from me.
I knew it when Jaley told Sarah to “stop making a whacket” as Sarah banged on her toy drums. I say “stop making a racket” a hundred times a day.
I know it whenever either of my girls says "please" and "thank you" without being told.
The answer to the question, do kids ever listen, is a resounding yes. They listen and learn from everything around them. As a mom, I try to make most of that “everything” positive. Though, I admit a few four-letter words slip out now and again.
I have now learned the question isn’t about listening, it is about doing. My job is not to get my kids to hear my requests (cleaning up, brushing teeth, and eating vegetables), but to get them to actually act on them.
Sometimes they do; sometimes they don’t. In a couple of years, I will no longer struggle to get my girls to brush their teeth. However, new things will arise – homework, curfews, and more. The listen-do struggle will continue. During that struggle between listening and doing, my girls will grow up and mature. If I am lucky, one day (after they turn 18) they won’t need to listen to my words anymore, because they will be able to do things for themselves.
Gigi appears every Friday on TriangleMom2Mom. To read more about Gigi, go to her blog Stroller Lane.
Gigi Harrell
Gigi is a TriangleMom2Mom featured blogger, appearing every Friday.
She's a mom of two daughters, ages 4 and 1½. Gigi’s path to a career in writing took the scenic route. She graduated from Georgia Tech with a degree in Industrial Engineering and a husband-to-be. After a few years of work and lots of play in California, they returned to their roots in the South. They landed in North Carolina where she graduated from UNC-Chapel Hill with an MBA. She worked in marketing for a large multinational company, but career priorities changed with the arrival of her girls. She stepped off the corporate track to start her own business. She now works full-time as a mom and part-time running her business and writing freelance. Gigi lives in Cary with her husband and two daughters balancing the havoc and harmony of everyday life.
Comments
Wait until they are each 10 years older and then they tell you a litany of outrageous things you used to tell them when they were little. My kids love to laugh at all the things they say I used to say. They seem to remember their childhood verbatim. Scary!
In a couple of years, I will no longer struggle to get my girls to brush their teeth.
Ha ha ha...uproarious laughter. I have a 12 yo and 15 yo and I still occasionally notice that their teeth look like they are wearing little sweaters!
A friend of mine substitutes "Shitaake mushrooms" for the S-word.
My daughter once told me about the teenage years, "you think I wasn't listening, but I heard every word" and eventually she paid attention.