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Table for Six
Eating out became a tad more challenging when we added our twins to the family. This was not exactly shocking. I expected that lugging two infant carriers around and trying to time things so I didn't have to spend the entire meal nursing babies would mix up the scenario to some degree. I just had to remember certain limitations when I ordered. Linguini? Yes. I can even twirl it left-handed. A giant burger? No. That's a two-handed meal unless I want to wear part of it.
The part that did surprise me was that finding a place to sit could suddenly be the most difficult part of our restaurant experience. Hostesses looked at us cross-eyed and held little meetings in the corner to whisper about where to put us.
Just getting the number right seemed to cause a lot more confusion than one might think. If I said, “We have four plus two babies,” we ran the risk of running into someone who stopped listening after the word “four” and then looked completely mystified when we didn’t want to sit with baby carriers on our laps. They were in carriers so they wouldn’t need to sit on our laps. But you can’t just say “six” when you have two infants because infants don’t sit in chairs like the rest of us and sometimes their car seats don’t fit in a booth (or they only fit on one side of the booth, making me feel rather like an octopus trying to spoon feed one on either side and still manage to eat something myself). I landed on “six, including two babies” as the default declaration, usually with a gesture towards the carrier in my arms to further illustrate our needs.
We still occasionally ended up with two extra chairs, but from our perspective too much space was better than not enough. Though there was one time that we were placed at a table for ten. What I believe happened here was that after the host determined we hadn’t included the babies in our count, even though we said “including,” he asked how many kids’ menus we needed and added that number on for good measure.
I’d like to say that it would be better for hostesses to simply take a moment and count us. But this is not always helpful. I remember one very young hostess who, after I said we had “six, including two babies,” decided that she could do a better count. She looked us over and said, “Hmm… four plus two babies. They’re like halves so that’s five.”
Five?! I was still scratching my head while she tried to wedge us into a corner. We made it work, but let me assure you that one baby in a car seat does not take up half as much space at the table as anyone else.
Things did become a bit simpler once we ditched the carriers and were able to say, “six, including two high chairs.” But just in case any restaurant managers are reading this let me make a plea: get the high chairs first. I realize that it feels like good service to seat us immediately. Usually what happens though is that we are led to a table and then left standing awkwardly in the middle of the dining room while someone runs off to fetch a high chair and bring it back and then goes to get another high chair and bring it back. We’d rather wait in the lobby until you are actually ready for us. Thank you.
Part of what makes seating more difficult now is not the twins’ fault. There are issues even when we do fast food and seat ourselves. We went, in one swift and sudden change, from being your average, run-of-the-mill, perfectly ordinary family of four to what has been politely referred to as a “larger” family of six. Most fast food places have only one or two areas set up for more than four people, if that. Sometimes we need to rearrange. Sometimes the tables are bolted to the floor.
Some of the issues are linked to our twins. Booths are almost always out of the question now. Only one high chair fits at the end of a booth. And where do you put the high chairs if the regular chairs are attached to the table or the floor? This might put us at the only table in the room marked with the handicap symbol. What if someone in a wheelchair comes in while we are using it?
This of course assumes that high chairs are available. Many smaller places have only two high chairs. If another family beats us to one or both, we might be out of luck. And this goes both ways. I once had someone give me a dirty look that I believe came from the fact that we were “hogging” the high chairs.
We’ll be alright though. In another year or two our babies won’t be babies anymore. We won’t need high chairs or space to put them. The answer to “how many” will be reduced to one word. But some tables will still be bolted to the floor.
It's always something...
Amanda grew up in a small town in northern Ohio. It’s the kind of place where teachers accidentally called her by her sister’s name and even occasionally, her mother’s. Even though Amanda has grown comfortable in Cary, ties to her hometown, where her father is currently Mayor, are still strong.
She moved to the Triangle when she got married in July of 1999 as her husband, D, had a job here. She soon found work in a field she never knew existed, but gave up a paycheck when her first child was born in May of 2003. Y got a little sister, J, in February 2006. Exactly one day after J turned three, the household was blessed with twins, baby boy G and baby girl M.
Mandy usually appears weekends on TriangleMom2Mom.
Comments
I'm curious as to why you eat out? Sounds like a big production...perhaps not worth the entertainment value. My kids were 2.5 years apart and we pretty much didn't eat out unless we had a babysitter until they were "civilized" enough to read a menu and order their own stuff.
My ulterior motive involves where and when you choose to eat out. If it's Applebees at 6:00, that's one thing. But I get frustrated when my husband and I choose to go out for a $100 meal, let's say at Lucky 32 at 7:30 or 8:00. We end up being unlucky enough to be seated next to a family, including a baby whose behavior ends up ruining our meal. Now, baby cries, Mom jumps up and takes him out to soothe him...that's cool with me. But baby cries and Mom and Dad just talk louder to drown out baby, I have a problem with that.
How's that for starting something? Would love to hear your feedback as well as your readers'.
Everything's made for families of 4-cars, restaurant tables, vacation packages, just everything......
I think as far as eating out goes.....I remember sometimes desperately wanting just to get out and have my children and myself served, fed, and cleaned up after. But we only went to family friendly restaurants, and it was always at 5, before the waits and crowds started and before my kids were starving. This almost always worked except for one memorable trip, my birthday, when the kids were so dreadful we had to pack up all our food, leave , and go home to eat. I was NOT happy to have my meal ruined, but I certainly wasn't going to ruin everyone else's around us.
Call ahead and let them know your specific needs! Even if it's only 15-20 minutes, it gives the host/hostess time to arrange their tables.
My kids are 18 months apart and there were about 2 years where it was just more trouble than it was worth to go to a resaturant that wasn't a buffet. But I really like eating out, so we ate at Cici's and Golden Corral (yes, I know) for 2 years. To this day I can't eat at either place, LOL.
My kids are 18 months apart and there were about 2 years where it was just more trouble than it was worth to go to a resaturant that wasn't a buffet. But I really like eating out, so we ate at Cici's and Golden Corral (yes, I know) for 2 years. To this day I can't eat at either place, LOL.
My kids are 18 months apart and there were about 2 years where it was just more trouble than it was worth to go to a resaturant that wasn't a buffet. But I really like eating out, so we ate at Cici's and Golden Corral (yes, I know) for 2 years. To this day I can't eat at either place, LOL.
Why do we eat out? Well, why does anyone? Mostly it's just nice to have someone else do the cooking and cleaning up. The small hassle of finding a table is worth it.
As for Diane's ulterior motive - don't worry about running into us when you're paying a babysitter. The restaurants I'm talking about are family places at 5 o'clock (or lunch). And even so I would immediately remove any child who caused a disturbance. I have never taken my brood to a "grown-up" restaurant. Even though my kids are generally well-behaved, they are still children and the couple at the next table shouldn't have to worry about what they might do to taint the experience.
Mandy, that's exactly the same reason I used to take mine to eat out when they were little. And for us often the mere act of getting out of hte house would make it a better day. We are big fans of the family restaurants at 5 pm also. I never thought that I would judge a potentional restaurant on the loud factor as being a positive thing (the loud restaurants make it harder to hear my kids), but you know, things change when you have kids.
i hear you. we have toddler twins & a preschooler, all boys. i think we may have only gone out to a sit-down place twice since the twins were born, since the thought of it just seemed too daunting. ever notice how many of those high chairs straps are BROKEN. ack! it's doable now (preferrably not on my own), but most of the time i just don't want to bother. we're still primarly drive-thruers. :)
what i find frustrating is trying to hang with other SAHMs that don't have multiples. until a few months ago, it was laughable for me to try to handle both of them, plus my preschooler while having a conversation & (god-forbid) eating--even at mcdonalds. other moms have tried to pitch in and be helpful, but most of the time i would just decline any outing that didn't involve my other limb, the DOUBLE-JOGGER. luckily we're slowly ditching the jogger in certain situations, but i still size up each outing according to whether or not i can manage it with them.
Mandy- one good thing: in awhile, you will be able to squeeze into a regular booth. The restaurants will assume you can't all sit there, but with 4 little ones, you really can, and it takes less time to get a table than waiting for a table of 6.
With three teens, those days are behind me, but my kids are happy to sit at a different table nearby instead of waiting for a larger table. Sometimes I'm happy to have them at a different table too. :)
I am reliving those moments with you - the mystifying looks as we carted in two baby carriers or attempted to maneuver a double stroller through the aisles, the grabs for the two high chairs, the seemingly endless pile of napkins we went through at those early feedings - all while tightly clinging to the ever patient singleton also in tow. Guess you know the trick of upending high chairs to hold carriers - works like a charm. Don't get me started on the dirty high chairs and boosters, ugggh. I recall on many occasions either asking for a clean cloth or going through my entire supply of baby wipes trying to get them clean (or at least unsticky) enough for me to touch, much less put my babies near or in, even at nice places.....Mine are now 8, 8 and 12, and good manners at home are the motivator for going out. They also love the idea of a separate table, but I still bend my ear to hear strains of their precious conversations (at least the non-whiny ones)!