I used to think that parenting was hard - the diaper changes, the sleepless nights, the wondering if I was doing it all right.

That was cake to what parenting is now.

I will take blowout diapers any day over figuring out the mind of a five year old. I have cried my heart out over the decisions I have had to make in dealing with my daughter’s behavior over the last few weeks.

A friend of mine and I were discussing this just the other day. We both have daughters about to start kindergarten. We both have been told “we don’t like you” or “I’m mad at you” or my personal favorite, “go away.” Nothing breaks my heart more than knowing my daughter is dealing with feelings and telling me to go away. I want to sit there and tell her it’s going to be okay. I want to hold her just like I did when she was a baby, let her head lay on my shoulder.

But I have to walk away, give her the space she needs to deal with her feelings. And normally after only a few minutes, she is laughing again at something funny I say and acting as if the entire episode didn’t even happen.

She’s testing boundaries and understanding her limits. I could take the easy road, let her have her way, give in to her at whim. But what kind of kid would I be raising at that point? So I take the hard road, the one filled with tears and guilt and hurtful words.

And I know it will be okay, I really do. I know I am raising a strong daughter who is learning to deal with her emotions. If only I could learn to deal with my emotions, maybe I could learn from my daughter.

Amy appears every Wednesday on TriangleMom2Mom. Read more about Amy at A Family Story.