My beloved Esmeralda has an advanced case of tournament trunk.

Now, before you rush to WebMD to look it up, let me explain: Esmeralda is my faithful minivan. And tournament trunk is a condition that occurs most often after a weekend (fill in the blank: tennis, baseball, softball) tournament.

The collection of all of the accoutrements necessary for the day or weekend long event amasses in the trunk. That would include uniforms, back up uniforms, long layers, short layers, cleats, Crocs, hats, shorts and of course, food and water. Then there are books, textbooks, Game boys and iPods for maintaining sanity (theirs and mine) between events.

Upon returning home from the weekend’s adventures, the exhaustion from the drive, the watching and the playing sets in, so all plans for mucking the car are tossed aside in favor for a restorative evening spent watching "The Amazing Race."

Then Monday comes. That’s when tournament trunk becomes serious. Because once the backpacks are loaded in, all the other gear that was taken out in preparation for the tournament gets hastily thrown back in to be used during the week, tournament trunk spreads like a rash throughout the van. The front passenger seat becomes full with water and snacks for the day’s after school events.

Random socks, athletic supporters, and yes, even underwear (not mine) can be found tucked behind the middle seat.

Cups from Sonic, wrappers from Wendy’s, runaway French fries, Cheezit crumbs, leftover cookie sprinkles and a brown banana peel provide a testimonial of my children’s balanced dietary fare.

Occasionally, I’ll become claustrophobic and scoop everything into a laundry basket and shove it into the garage, accidentally but inevitably blocking my husband’s access to parking. He so loves that.

And, periodically, I’ll set aside time to take out everything from the car, distribute it to its proper place (kids’ rooms, recycling bin, trash can, washing machine, library basket), and thoroughly vacuum. My kids get in the van and gasp in wonder and appreciation: “Whose car is this?”

Esmeralda maintains her glory of cleanliness for maybe all of a day. Then, just like a bad winter cold or a case of shingles, that nasty chronic case of tournament trunk comes right back.

Pamela appears Tuesdays on TriangleMom2Mom. Read more about Pamela on her blog Crazy is My Life.