Abstinance education simply doesn't work, (there have been studies to prove this) and there is no guarantee that a young woman that waits until marraige won't be exposed to HPV by her husband, unless he were also chaste until marraige. With people getting married later and later (mid to late 20's and beyond) "saving oneself" until marraige doesn't seem very feasible. And while it is true that over recent times our acceptance of sex outside of marraige has become more widely accepted, I simply cannot imagine how we could possibly go BACK to a time when women were shamed for their sexuality, yet men were never held to the same standard. I cannot think of a single "moral" cultural norm that has reversed itself; things that were taboo just 30 or 40 years ago (same-sex relationships, children born out of wedlock, interracial relationships) are accepted today.

My rule of thumb: avoid medical intervention, drugs, vaccines, that have not been used for twenty years, unless in life threatening emergencies. Especially if statistically the chances of being hurt without the intervention are miniscule enough. (History has repeatedly told: almost all medical interventions from a generation past--go back as far in time as you wish-- are thought to be ill-advised in the next generation.) Everyone can judge for themselves the risk of leaving themselves exposed to colds, flu, rare diseases, or common diseases with 99% innocuous rates of negative consequences. Generations of mankind have survived on the planet relying on their healthy immune systems. The millions of dollars to be made on making people think they need a drug or vaccine against common ailments is staggering. If you think spending money on that sort of thing is important, do. Personally, I'll consider the cervical cancer vaccine twenty years from now. The statistical risk of my child dying of cervical cancer is much smaller than being killed by many more common things that are around her at all times. I'm not getting it. If my daughter decides as an adult to get it, that is fine. I think it is silly to scare people into getting vaccines rather than having them think about the statistical risk to themselves or their children if they do not.

A1mama-you are 100% correct.

I think it is reasonable to wait until your daughter is a little older than twelve and the vaccine has been available even longer. It certainly is difficult, however, to try to predict the age when one's child becomes sexually active and lost opportunity can have long term ramifications for her health. I do always find the sexism inherent in medical trials to be interesting. Why wasn't the vaccine approved in boys/men at the same time? Where were most of the girls/women getting exposed to the virus? Vaccinating most of the male college freshmen in NC would drastically cuts the rates of viral transmission. But not to worry...It looks like the manufacturer of Gardasil is trying to get approval in men as well.

I agree with A1mama....but honestly, vaccines aside, I think that we can successfully teach our children to wait until marriage. Both my husband and I waited until marriage and we have been married for 11 years now. Our relationship is very fulfilling and strong especially since we don't have the emotional baggage of past relationships to deal with. I desire to raise the bar high for my kids and teach and encourage them to walk the same path.

Don't put an ambulance at the bottom of the cliff, put a fence at the top! Give your children the tools to wait, the encouragement and all of the facts. These days, the consequences are too high to not teach them to wait.

The life long consequences of teen sex can be devastating. Our kids are worth more than that and they need to know it.

Thanks, Cadydid, for your rare ideas! You are saying things that are important, and seem obvious, but are often ignored or scoffed at. I think most kids grow up in a different, casual-sexual world than the one you describe, as we all clearly know. The reality of teen sex can be recognized and addressed, as well as teaching our kids to live something better.  

It's sad that these ideas are rare, isn't it? I will not teach my children to play with fire and having sex as a teen is worse than playing with fire. We do not attempt to teach our kids to play with fire "safely" do we? I think not!

The dreadful lifelong consequences of STD's, unwanted pregnancies, abortion, etc....these are not things that anyone would wish upon their children! Yet, we teach our kids to do it and "try" to do it safely! It's sheer lunacy, in my opinion.

Why not teach our girls to use their brains instead of flaunting their bodies? When women dress modestly, a man will look her in the face and engage her intellect, not ogle her and view her as an sex item to be used and discarded.

Start with your own girls! Let them be little girls while they are little! Encourage them to think and teach them that they are too good and valuable to be used by a man as a one night stand somewhere. Our girls used to reach higher than this. They have lowered themselves in the most degrading manner by only aspiring to be the best pole dancer at frat parties.

The parents are responsible for not teaching them better! Just do it, for goodness sake and quit with all of the politically correct mumbo jumbo that everyone spouts off without THINKING of the consequences.

The whole world has gone mad. I know that I sound like a grandmother saying all this, but I am only in my early thirties, mom of two girls and one boy.

Read "A Return to Modesty" by Wendy Shalit. It will change you.