Ah, OK, well every child and situation is different, but having 2 teen boys and seeing their friends almost every day after school gives me a perspective.

My teens are not allowed to use the phone during meals, either talking or texting. They know simple courtesy rules, that they shouldn't answer it if we are playing a game, watching a movie at home together, eating out together, etc, but sometimes after they see the incoming number, they will take a call, and since the 'calls' last about 10 seconds, and they don't get a lot, it has not been a big deal, but I still remind them it is rude. They seem to be fine with these common courtesy rules.

They MUST pick up when we call them. If they do not have a REALLY good excuse (prom music was too loud, he had it muted during a concert, etc) then it is taken away from them for 'x' days.

Other than that, if they go over our allotted minutes, they pay the difference ( we've only had this once or twice, but they are boys and boy's don't talk much, they text, and then not even as much as girls)

Now, when we first gave it to them, it was in 7th grade, going to after school activites, and we worried about safety and getting stuck at school, so it was mostly used for calling us and keeping in touch with us when out of the house. Not many of their friends had them, so it did not become an issue until HS.

First year of HS was when they went crazy because all the kids seemed to have phones and they were from other neighborhoods and they started having a girlfriend. That is when the minutes rule was given, and when we had to explain common cell phone courtesy.

I find that now that they are 16 and 17, they are using MYSPACE an FACEBOOK  and MSN to 'chat' with their friends more than the cell. Now, THAT is the next issue we faced, and we occasionally check on his page to make sure there is nothing too extreme on it or inappropriate.(but we should check more often). They do that at night while hanging out watching TV or playing video games.

Teens have so much pressure to be like their friends, so the cell phone and texting is a right of passage in these times. However, like the other forum posts have said, it means that we have to make a real effort to create 'family' time that you want to spend actively being 'present' to each other, engaging in conversation and activities together. Teens that have younger siblings need to be treated differently, and feel as if they are getting their own time with their parents doing 'teen' things like going to a skate park or movie or mall or playing video games, or just hanging out watching a show after the other kids have gone to bed. They are changing and need to be treated older. If you give them this, and tell him why you have these rules, I bet that will help.