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Who qualifies as an experienced mom?
Am I an experienced mom? I have two children. The oldest will be five in a few days. He hasn’t even started school yet so I know I have much to experience and much to learn. At the same time, I have a hard time remembering what my life was like before I became a mom. The newness has certainly worn off.
So when I signed up for this site and faced the choice of “new mom” or “experienced mom,” neither seemed quite right. I still have no idea what it feels like to help my little one with homework or see him behind the wheel of a car. I have not yet experienced a first date or the shame of not knowing which pop icon my child is referring to. But I have gone through potty training (twice) and surely labor counts for something. I know the joy of a child who can say “I love you” and the annoyance of a shoe in the toilet. And unfortunately, I’ve even experienced moments when I feared for my child’s life. Am I there yet? I don’t know. In the end, I settled on “new mom” almost solely because “experienced” sounded a little too much like a euphemism for “old.”
It's always something...
I remember my mother saying this whenever one of us came to her with a problem. I'm beginning to understand more fully what she meant by it.
Am I an experienced mom? I have two children. The oldest will be five in a few days. He hasn’t even started school yet so I know I have much to experience and much to learn. At the same time, I have a hard time remembering what my life was like before I became a mom. The newness has certainly worn off.
So when I signed up for this site and faced the choice of “new mom” or “experienced mom,” neither seemed quite right. I still have no idea what it feels like to help my little one with homework or see him behind the wheel of a car. I have not yet experienced a first date or the shame of not knowing which pop icon my child is referring to. But I have gone through potty training (twice) and surely labor counts for something. I know the joy of a child who can say “I love you” and the annoyance of a shoe in the toilet. And unfortunately, I’ve even experienced moments when I feared for my child’s life. Am I there yet? I don’t know. In the end, I settled on “new mom” almost solely because “experienced” sounded a little too much like a euphemism for “old.”
It's always something...
I remember my mother saying this whenever one of us came to her with a problem. I'm beginning to understand more fully what she meant by it.
Comments
I'm with you on the "new mom" and "experienced mom" thing. I'm the mom of a 3-year-old -- not entirely new or experienced. I picked new because I don't want to sound old either.
And I've actually been trying to come up with other choices, but can't exactly settle on them. What would it be anyway? Relatively new mom; experienced, but not old mom ... (suggestions welcome).
Someone from another mom site said it's been suggested that each person's description should change based on their particular attitude at the moment, which could be pretty funny. Tired mom, mad mom, don't get me started mom, etc.
Thanks for posting!
Sarah (mom of a 3-year-old and also the site's editor)
I turn forty this year and my 20th wedding anniversary is fast approaching. I have a tween (11) and two teens (13 and 15) , so I had no choice but to pick Experienced Mom even though I know it means Old Mom.
How about something along the lines of: Preschool Mom, Elementary Mom, Tween Mom or Teen Mom. (Although Teen Mom sounds more like ‘Teen Who Is A Mom’ than ‘Mom Of A Teen’) Of course, you would have to allow for multiple submissions. For example, this year I would be a Tween / Teen Mom. In two years I would just be a Teen Mom. Sounds a lot younger than Experienced Mom.
Clearly I don’t have the solution. Good luck in your search for a politically correct way to name us old moms.
Maybe we should do something like Mom since the year their first child was born. So I'd be mom since 2005.
I like the "mom since" idea. It's simple and we should all have more simple in our lives.
I too like the "mom since" idea