Breastfeeding in Public

I breastfed my daughter and sometimes that had to happen in public. Thankfully, I never had the reaction that this woman had at a Denny's in Asheville or heard the kinds of comments made by the first few people who have commented on this story. (The mom's name is Crystal and one poster says that only strippers are named Crystal.) I'm glad to hear that Denny's has apologized. I hope they do create a policy for breastfeeding in their restaurants.

I agree that there are modest ways to breastfeed when in public ... like for instance, I wouldn't just let the girls hang out exposed for an extended period of time. But I really don't understand what the big deal is. Breasts were made to feed babies. And experts around the world agree breastfeeding is best for babies. Babies need to eat, sometimes every couple of hours for the littlest ones ... and I really don't think they should be relegated to the car or (gross) bathroom to do that.

Thoughts?

How do you keep your milk supply up once you return to work?

Okay I've been back at work for about two weeks now and I'm already experiecing a drought in my milk supply. Does anyone out there have any tips or tricks to the trade to prevent this from happening?

Share Your Breastfeeding Story

Today (Wednesday), two Triangle birthing centers - N.C. Women's Hospital at UNC Health Care and the Women's Birth and Wellness Center - are receiving awards from the N.C. Breastfeeding Coalition for not handing out free gift bags from infant formula companies.

The bags include free formula samples and coupons. Breastfeeding advocates say that the free formula is an incentive for breastfeeding moms to quit or, at least, supplement with formula. The awards are coming out the same week as World Breastfeeding Week.

So in honor of World Breastfeeding Week, I thought we could start a forum where moms share their breastfeeding stories - the trials and the triumphs.

I'll start with a short version of my very long story.

Nursing did not coming easily to me. It took at least two months for my daughter to latch on on a regular basis successfully. I used a nipple shield, nipple guard and about every other product out there. I suffered from thrush, mastitis and severe pain. I survived a nursing strike, where my daughter at 9 months, refused to nurse for a week. She never took a bottle despite many many attempts. I made many calls to UNC's Warmline.

But I was confident that it was what I wanted to do and I had a lot of support. And it finally worked out.

So what's your story? Share your breastfeeding trials and triumphs.

Almost New Jeep Overland Jogging Stroller

For Sale:  Jogging stroller bought new, only used a few times.  Grey with turqoise stripes.  I can send picture or you can come see it.  Asking $120 919-389-7970

Teen Social Bullying

"Bullying" is a term that will bring different pictures to the minds of people.  We all know toddlers and young children will 'bully' each other with and without menace, as they are trying to figure out the social rules as they grow.  But bullying in the teen years has changed dramatically since this mom was that age.

Teens today deal with all the 'usual' social angst and insecurities that we grew up with, but today it's compounded by instant communication via phones and Facebook.  A situation that would cool down by separation of angry teens is extended and expanded exponentially through these electronic medium.  And today, sadly, the consequences of bullying are far too often traumatic for not just the child bullied, but innocent bystanders as well.

Recently, my son's group of five close friends went through a bad stage.  It seemed that each week one of the guys was on the outs with the rest.  Too often lately, it'd been my son.  It peaked on a day when first the rest avoided him around the neighborhood and then, when they met up at a park, them leaving him there alone.  It ended that night with Facebook exchanges that definitely upped the ante.  It was devastating for him, and heartbreaking for me.

I realize our kids need to learn how to deal with such situations, but I have also learned in 20 years of parenting that we parents need to step in much more often than we're led to believe, because the fact is our teens are NOT adults, and they need guidance throughout the teen years.  I have learned that even when I was sure they weren't listening, they were doing so closely.

So after I said goodnight late that night to an extremely sad young man, I decided to email one of the boys' mothers, one I knew better than the rest; one I had learned through casual discussions on the sidelines had a similar parenting philosophy.  This was not a decision I made lightly.  You never know today how parents will react to being told their kids have done something wrong.  I have been called a liar, told my son was one, told I just needed to let them handle it and all too often been told there was no way their child could've done what I said.  So I was trepedatious, but I wrote it anyway.  I explained what had happened,  and admitted that the next time it could very well be my son who'd be one of the bullies instead of the 'bullee'.  I said I knew we could not force them to be friends or to talk, but that we could guide them to either be friends to each other or not, and stop the emotional roller coaster they'd been putting themselves on.  I asked for her advice and opinion, and requested that she tell me if she knew of ways my son had contributed to the current situation.  And then I sent it off, trusting cyberspace to convey my heartbreak, my fear and my questions the way I felt them, borne of a piercing pain deep in my heart and soul.

The next morning, I found a new 'village.'  You see, I've always believed in the idea of it taking a village to raise a child.  I grew up in a blue collar area where every mother was my mother, or just as well was, since I couldn't take a wrong step without it being back to mom before I got home.   Well, this mom called me first thing.  Her son had already told her the night before what they'd done, and she'd been appalled.  My note was the icing on the cake.  She called the other mothers and told them what had happened, and they too were on the same page.  The group of us talked and realized we each had found a heretofore unknown support system, right in our neighborhood.  They made it clear they agreed that it had reached the point for parental guidance, and handled it with each of their sons. 

The boys?  Well, let's just say that each of these parents got to see that the seeds of conscience that they'd spent 15 years germinating in their boys flower that week.  On the bus home from school, before they'd even heard they were in trouble, they had apologized to my son, righting his world with a few words.   They weren't off the hook at home, but the fact they'd owned up to their actions on their own was huge. 

It was, after all was said and done, both the best and worst of weeks.  All of us involved grew a bit more, and our boys took a few more step toward being responsible, compassionate young men.  I feel a sense of support I'd not felt before, and know the others feel the same.

Our boys will fight again, and no doubt they will drift in and out of friendship over the coming years.  We parents can't control that and shouldn't.  But through this incident I was reassured that no matter how fast society tries to hurry our kids along to adulthood, it's too early to throw in the parental towel during the teens.  And I have kindred spirits out there who have learned the same thing.  As I always say when talking about parenting teens, there's safety in numbers. 

Sex and the City

So, who's going to see Sex and the City this weekend? If you're going, are you dressing up? Are you going with friends? To a party first or after?

My sister saw it last night in Denver and said it was great. She loved the show when it was on HBO. I never had HBO but I've caught reruns, late at night when I can't sleep. I'll go see the movie, but I'm not sure if I'll get there this weekend.

Weirdest Place to Pump

Where's the weirdest place you ever pumped (breastmilk that is)?

The Washington Post has this story about where and how women pump when they're away from home or at work. One woman apparently taped a picture of a cow to her office door when she started pumping.

As my daughter never took a bottle (and no I don't consider that a badge of honor. We tried and tried and tried she just never would do it), I never really had to deal with it. Luckily, I was able to walk to her day care.

But one of my colleagues, Ruth Sheehan, said her top three oddest pumping places were in a utility closet at a rural library, a Subway bathroom and right in the middle of a busy LAX airport bathroom (great birth control lesson for the girls walking by, she says). Ruth says she used her in-car pump so much it burned out the plug inside her car.

Pediatrician Reccomendation for new moms in Raleigh and Brier Creek

I thought I'd share my our family's experience with Blue Ridge Pediatrics-  info below.Blue Ridge Pediatrics
3124 Blue Ridge RD # 102 (near Rex)
Raleigh , North Carolina 27612
Phone: (919) 782-0021or Brier Creek Location: WakeMed Medical Plaza, Suite 104 • 919-226-0662I have two boys, and both have been seen by Blue Ridge since they were born. The pediatricians there- Dr. Louis Allen, Dr. Ellen DeFlora, Dr. Nicholas D'Avanzo, and Dr. Deepa Vijay- have all treated my sons for various childhood aliments and injuries over the years. I cannot recommend the practice more highly.  The pediatricians, nurses, and office staff set a tone that puts the child first, and make it easy to get answers and treatment. If you call them after hours, one of the pediatricians will call you back (not an answering service or a nurse, but one of YOUR doctors). They will see you on a Saturday if your kid is ill, and you call and need to come in. They will do blood tests for white cell counts, strep tests, flu tests, and other basic tests there in the office, negating the need to go to an offsite testing venue with a sick child. They will come to Rex or WakeMed when you deliver, and are supportive of nursing moms. They have a phone nurse available Monday-Friday to coordinate care if you have a referral to a specialist or need a refill. These nurses are all extremely knowledgeable and helpful.  One other benefit- the pediatricians are packed with personality. Dr. DeFlora is the practical, Birkenstock-wearing Dr. Mom.  Dr. D'Avanzo is the soothing, "it will all be OK, let's just see what happens, and I'd like to see you back..." doctor, who was probably always the smartest kid in his class. Dr. Vijay is the approachable mom- she is petite and sweet to the kids, and can practically diagnose your kid just by looking at him.  She switches into no-nonsense mode during an emergency, so don't worry about her not being tough enough.  And Dr. Allen is a character out of a novel. He is hilarious, and will spend most of the visit telling you about his kids while observing yours. He will act quickly and decisively if need be, and to great effect.  He put my baby in the hospital after one elevated white count for what turned out to be an infection that would've been serious had he not acted so fast- and my child is perfectly fine today.

I'm a big fan of this practice, and they just opened another location at the WakeMed Brier Creek medical park. I thought I'd share because they've been really good to my kids, and they are the kind of doctors who deserve to be successful. Thanks for reading.