Crazy Is My Life

What I'll Know Then...

The moment I knew I was pregnant, I looked for help, advice, instructions.Â âWhat to Expect When Youâre Expectingâ became my World Book Encyclopedia.Â What I should feel, what I should eat, how the baby would developâall was laid out for me.

Posted -279632 sec. ago.

Unimaginable

Sometimes, life is not just unfair. Sometimes, it is cruel and evil. Sometimes, it presents you with news so horrible, it is hard to believe or understand. That was my reaction when I heard that five-year-old Shaniya Davis -- who had been missing for nearly a week -- was found dead in a wooded area.

Posted 3 days ago.

Sunday, Monday, Me Day

You know how you always wish you had more time. A few more minutes? A spare hour? We had an extra hour last week when we switched back to Eastern Standard Time. (Alas, I didn't take full advantage of it at 2 a.m.)Â But that wasn't enough for me. I'm greedy. I need a whole 'nother day of the week. Â It strikes me every Sunday evening, as I rush around doing laundry, getting at least enough gr…

Posted 1 week ago.

It's Getting Old

It started when I hit the other side of forty -- the age, not the highway. Those little twinges in my back that appeared when I lifted a heavy basket of laundry, or playfully tussled with the kids.

Posted 2 weeks ago.

Missing and Mourned

Once, my son Tyler went missing. He was barely two years old, and we were in a mall. It didn't happen on my watch, but it could have. When we discovered that he wasn't where he was supposed to be, I can't even describe how scared I was. We looked all around the music store, up and down the aisles, under the racks of CDs, anywhere a toddler might hide. No. We looked up and down the hallway of the m…

Posted 4 weeks ago.

Flu Lessons

Are you like me? As soon as my kids enter the car, before I even say hello, I pass them the hand sanitizer. "Don't put your hands near your mouth!" I screech when I glance in my rearview mirror and notice them scratching their cheeks. Swine flu -- excuse me, H1N1 -- is all around us. And although I'm most likely jinxing myself by writing this blog, so far, we have been spared. But I don't get the …

Posted 1 mon. ago.

New Danger: Parking Space Rage

We are a nation of angry people. We have sports rage and road rage. Now I'd like to introduce yet another type of anger: Parking Space Rage. It's caused when after searching for a parking space; you finally track someone returning to their car, you stalk them, following slowly until they get in their car. You turn on your turn signals, alerting everyone around that this is now your claimed spot. B…

Posted 1 mon. ago.

Red and Yellow and Green, Oh My!

It was so easy when they were little (and no, I didn't realize it then). Pop open a jar of Gerber's green mush, make airplane noises, and you could surprise a spoonful or three in their mouths before their taste buds caught up. Now? Not so much. Now my kids insist that a serving of French fries counts as a vegetable. And when you add ketchup? Well, you've got a complete meal.

Posted 1 mon. ago.

Pear Bottom Jeans

A fascinating scientific phenomenon occurs during the summer. Microscopic organisms invade my closet and feast on my clothes. Unlike moths, which leave visible holes in material, these stealthy organisms almost seamlessly shrink my clothes. I always discover it on that first nippy morning when I realize that it is time to pull out the jeans. With luck, I have time before rushing out the door to pu…